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Monthly Archives: May 2010

Walking Home

After watching “Walking Home” I felt this sense of relief. Simply, about the fact that, wow I’m not the only one that this nonsense is happening to. I mean being harrassed on the street is no secret. But just the fact that someone made a documentry out of it…The only thing I can say is Thank You. I moved from a walking city, bike riding city, high usage of public transportation city, to a driving city where walking is unheard of. Which is understandable, because this damn place is so spaced out. Anyway, it took some adjusting and I’m still adjusting. I remember when I first moved to a certain block and I would walk from anywhere to the bus stop, or down the street to the store and I would get harrassed. It got to the point where I expected it.  My harrassment would come in all forms from the ‘subtle’ honking  horns excessively, whistling, to the annoying calls of “hey girl’ ‘hey,you gotta man” “hey you need a ride’ ‘hey, girl come here’ ‘hey, hey, hey’. To the extreme, where I was walking home at night and someone threw their water filled cup at me. I think it’s one of those things where you feel so many things at once (anger, frustration, fear) that at that moment I literally felt nothing at all.
 
And any woman knows, heaven forbid I don’t respond to their idiotic remarks, suddenly we become a bitch. A ‘fuck you bitch’ or ‘Bitch, you ugly anyway’ etc etc. Did I hurt their ego that much that I didnt go running to their oh so ‘romantic’ gestures. I’ve even had men who have followed me in their cars. Stopping at the intersection, when they clearly have the right away, waiting til I cross to suddenly pull up to me and stare me down or do the well known cat call. I’ve had men do complete 180’s in their car to see if I wanted a ride. Really? I mean how many women actually get in these guy’s cars. How many woman’s hearts flutter when some strange guy grabs us by the arm and says “What up, sexy” How many us silently think, “wow, I’ve met my prince charming when being followed by a huge black van. I would like to hope, NOBODY. So why do these idiots continue to do this.  I guess its not even about ‘getting’ the girl. There just doing it because they can. Its about power and simple ignorance and complete lack of respect
 
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Posted by on May 27, 2010 in dear diary

 

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Red Hats

Amazing that a Wendy Williams show actually provoked deep intellectual thought. If for some rare reason I’m home around that time, I tune her in and it just so happened that Damon Wayons was featured. He was speaking about his new book “Red Hats” which actually sounded really interesting. About a woman who was always provoking her husband and starting drama. And one day she told him that she wish’s he would just die. And that’s exactly what he did. So now this woman has all this guilt resting on her shoulders. She eventually joins the this group of women. The Red Hat society. (I’m making up the society part, but you get it) and anyways, it’s through these women that she learns to cope and love herself again. I’m diggin’ that. And plus, it’s from one of the Wayan’s brother, so it has to be somewhat comedic. Weird because a few weeks ago I picked it up in Borders, but for some reason or another I ended up getting “Little Bee” instead. Interesting/Okay, read. Anyway, back to my point. Damon said something that really struck  me. He stated how he had all these short stories, finished and unfinished writings around his house. Everything from sci-fi, to mystery, to comedy. And he was saying that he was going through major writer’s block. He explained going overseas just to “find himself” and basically the idea of “Red Hats” came from his self discovery, so to speak. And I’m just feeling him at that moment like yeah Damon,  me too. I mean how many un-finished work just lies around, littered on usb and document drives, emails, journals and even scraps of paper. And the damn writers block, don’t even get me started. But he said one thing that struck me, was that he began starting a journal that began with, “I didnt write today because…” And the funny thing from that is that you simply began writing, just from that little sentence.  Today I didnt write (add to my story) because I couldn’t express any new ideas and honestly I wasnt even thinking about it. On top of that I have this ‘new’ story flooding my brain that I have yet to put into words….   

So basically thats how I’m going to start my day. Another thing added to the morning rituals,….meditations and stretching….

Anyway, recently or actually today I was reading a blog and saw a very familiar blog on their blogroll. A part of me was like ignore it, but a strong part was very curious. Since deleting pretty much any contact info from this SO, this blog was the only contact I had. So I click on and read the March blog dated sometime early March and this SO mentions me and somewhat explains her decisions (about us) and what not. I’m thinking wow, I am so late on reading this. Next, why couldnt this SO just verbally tell me. What’s the big deal. Anywho, if that SO is reading I wish them blessings in their journeys through life and I enjoyed a short but nice experience with them.

 Peace n blessings

 
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Posted by on May 17, 2010 in dear diary

 

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I Would Have Killed Jenny in Season One

So the famo’s are coming to town and I’ll be sure to take plenty o:’ pics. I’m doing the whole au naturel thinga majig with the hair and I have to say it’s really cute. I’m sure the higher ups literally ran straight to the ‘grooming’ handbook to see what violations I was breaking, so far I havnt been handed the “that’s a little bit too negro for us” pinkslip. Mind you, in some cities and some jobs that shit still takes place. Like I said its cute, its one of those start a revolution hair styles, you know the type. Anywho I told the lil sis that I would hook her up with one when she stops by.  I was also thinking of sporting my ‘I would have killed Jenny….’ t-shirt while the famo was here. I love throwing subtle gay hints at the fam. I mean it’s not like my mom would know who the hell Jenny Shes-is-chick is anyway. And what about my very gay t-shirt with the rainbows plastered on every inch…does she actually know what the rainbow represents…and what about my “Do Ask, Do Tell” beater, which I havnt gotten yet, it’s coming. Will she look at me side ways. I know the look, the ‘mama look’, the lips pierced together look of disapproval, the “I know your not walking out the house like that” look. The “please don’t embarrass me in public” look. But isnt that what children do best. I mean no matter how old you grow, there’s this rebellious side that seems to remain between parent and child. And anywho, I love my mom to death, but to see that look and to know she can’t ground me anymore, is just classic and hilarious. 🙂

 
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Posted by on May 11, 2010 in dear diary

 

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Happy Mommy’s Day

Happy Mother’s Day to all the mom’s out there. We genuinely appreciate you. *Smiles* & *Hugs*

Will actually see my mom on the 22nd along with lil sis and cuzzy.  Their staying for the week, can’t wait 🙂

 
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Posted by on May 9, 2010 in dear diary

 

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Condoms leading to Arrest

“First [the police officer] asked me what I was doing with all these condoms. Then he took the bag and threw it in the garbage. Then he arrested me.”

A transgender woman in New York City, from a 2009 Sex Workers Project survey.

(Ms. Magazine, winter 2010)

Apparently this is a common practice of confiscating condoms from sex workers when detained by the police. Not to mention grounds for arrest if you have “too many” (?) According to a recent Sex Workers Survey, an overwhelmingly majority have concerns about the limit of condoms they can have at once without being hassled by the police. The practice of confiscating condoms is highly practiced in states such as New York City, Washington, D.C., and the San Francisco Bay Area. Not surprising, Washington D.C. has the highest AIDS/HIV infection rate. Unfortunately there will always be prostitutes and sex workers. Though I would love to see these women, men, and often time youth off the street, that’s not going to happen. No matter how many times these individuals get arrested, beaten, or their condoms taken away these women and men remain on the street. So why not keep them protected. Taking condoms away from them is not going to curb prostitution. It’s only going to put them at risk.  And when you think about it, the people actually recieving ‘services’ by prostitutes are going back home to significant others and spouses. Law enforcement is not just putting sex workers at risk but also the community as a whole.

And to say “well hey just don’t be a prostitute”. Well unfortunately that issue is here  to stay. And the least we can do is continue to aid in their protection, (not confiscating condoms), which in turns aids in the overall safety of the community.

 
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Posted by on May 5, 2010 in dear diary

 

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