Monthly Archives: June 2011

Trip was amazing. It was everything and more. It was more than a mere vacation. I actually had a defining Aha moment. We talked about us and the future. It was like time stood still. Everyone looked the same. No one was tragically aging. Most were healthy and happy. I was glad to see old and new faces.
What I learned on my trip was I’m definitely getting a bike. A motorcycle that is. After riding around on A’s, I’m completely hooked. I WANT one!
Next, and most importantly I learned that when making vital decisions about my life and future I need to make that decision based on ME, and only me. No one else. Basically I fell in love again. And not with who and what I thought I would. Yeah, its too bad that all the places that I happen to fall in love with aren’t anywhere close to family: PDX, Mpls, NY…I feel like I constantly have to go out my way to enjoy my damn self. However, life/places are what you make of it. But why is  ‘making it’ so difficult in some places and seamless in others. Since I’m tired of chasing family around I’ve made my decision.
*T, just fucking move already*
Peeped that fam didn’t make any comments on my facebook Pride pictures. Lol. raised eyebrow

~update. Except for a facebook ‘friend’ who promptly got deleted for being ignorant. oh well~

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Posted by on June 28, 2011 in Uncategorized


Happy Pride!

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Posted by on June 26, 2011 in Lesbo stuff


People making a difference

Studology speaks about the Brown Boi Project and Pookz experience on one of the retreats.  (peeped the o’ so familiar Secret journal she had).

Anyway I love what the Brown Boi Project represents. I wish I could have had this when I was growing up. However it’s not too late, the program is designed for youth leaders age 35 and under. Here’s a snippet of what they’re about:

“The Brown Boi Project is a community of masculine of center womyn, men, two-spirit people, transmen, and our allies committed to transforming our privilege of masculinity, gender, and race into tools for achieving Racial and Gender Justice.

*Masculine of center (MoC) recognizes the cultural breadth and depth of identity for lesbian/queer womyn who tilt toward the masculine side of the gender scale, and the term includes a wide range of identities such as butch, stud, aggressive/AG, tom, macha, boi, dom, etc.

What is it? What do they do?

“During the 5-day retreat you will have the opportunity to work across issues and communities, talk about race, class, culture, gender and sexuality, and explore what a commitment to social justice looks like for you and how you want to help your community. These retreats bring participants from across the country to experience an intensive introduction to community organizing while doing important personal leadership development. You will receive training in understanding power, communications, cross culture coalition building, personal finance, community organizing, self-care, fundraising, relationship building, gender justice, and personal life planning. “


Posted by on June 20, 2011 in Uncategorized


Just another pic. Whitney with her classic ‘deer caught in the headlights/I’m teed off cuz I haven’t had sex in like 10 hrs’ look. And poor Sajdah simply blending into the wallpaper. Lighting, people! Otherwise, hot as always

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Posted by on June 20, 2011 in Lesbo stuff


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And another bottle of Reisling on my desk 🙂

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Posted by on June 17, 2011 in dear diary, Uncategorized


Exactly one more week until I leave for mpls. Will it be everything I expected and more?

Something that really stuck to me. I mentioned to my mom about bringing something back from mpls for her, souvenirs, etc. She stated, “No child, as long as you just come back home, that’s all.”

Hm. And what if I don’t. I absolutely do not consider this place to be my home. Cali is home, of course but I honestly have no interest in moving there. Unless I land some amazing job offer. This place….No. I moved here first off to be near family. Now that I have spent two and half years here, I’m just not feeling it. This is not my home. This is my sister’s home.

It’s interesting because family is so worried about distance, but I honestly still see them just as frequently as when I lived in mpls. At least 2wice a year. Last year I think it could have been 3 because we planned a family trip outside of the holidays. Does it just ‘feel’ better or easier when I’m just 8 hours away and see you 2 times a year. Opposed to thousands of miles away and I still see you 2 times a year.

I usually do what the hell I want. I don’t have any obligations to anyone. Why does this feel so hard.

Basically, what if it happens. That second chance at love. uggghh this sounds soo lame…but that’s what I’m nervous about. That rekindling of sorts. That ‘why did I ever let you go’ feeling. That you just know…

Am I ready now?…Am I being too premature? Taking this way out of context. It’s a fucking pride weekend. See old friends. Have fun. Act a fool. Not fall in love.

Why do I have a funny feeling….

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Posted by on June 16, 2011 in Uncategorized



 When I came in to work this morning there was a card and giftbag  on my desk with a bottle of Reisling inside. Awww how sweet. My co-worker knows me well. Anywho, made me smile. Moms flight came in this afternoon, so I guess we’ll be sipping on this tonight.

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Posted by on June 10, 2011 in Uncategorized